Question mark by Marco Bellucci
As I sit here in my computer room here at home, I wonder what I have done this year? Where have I gone this year? What awesome place have I gone to? The answer, absolutely nowhere and nothing. For a lot of you who knows me this is very unlike me. I am usually out somewhere in the world either running a marathon, cycling to somewhere or hiking, camping somewhere. None of that happened this year. I ask myself, why? What is going on?
The answer is still unknown. Have I lost the motivation? Where has my adventure spirit gone? Have I done, gone and seen too much?
There seems to be some sort of negative energy that is sucking on my soul that I need to expunge. This is the only thing I can think of.
My only satisfaction I have had this year is Coaching for Team in Training/ Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. It has given me a different perspective in running and coaching. I truly enjoy seeing my runners each week reach their goals. Running farther then they have ever dreamed about. After running 20 marathon, 15 Half marathon, and 18 century rides, it has brought me back to the basics. Coaching has allowed me to remember how it used to feel about running.
Just a couple of weeks ago, I was coaching TNT runners at the Chicago Half Marathon and was at mile 5, 6 and 11,12. I had a sprain ankle that I was trying to recover from, but seeing everyone running.. pushing their way to the finish line gave me a new sense of excitement. I wanted to be out there running again. I felt again that drive, that fun of running. Every time I saw one of my runners, I would jump in and throw some positive words and reinforcement off encouragements. It brought me great joy to see how happy they were to see me and run and help them continue on. I had no idea the satisfaction I would get out of it.
So, moving forward, what am I going to do? I thought and thought of what I can do next year. I know my body has asked over and over for a break from running. The pivoting point of when I got burned out was right after the 2nd toughest marathon in the Nation. Leadville, Colorado Marathon. Running at 10,000 feet to 13,500 feet and back over rocky terrain and at some parts impossible to run.... was extremely taunting. With only about 130 runners and about 25% of them quitting I kept on going. I did not see any end to it. Talking to some of the other runners it seemed like I was the only marathoner there among all the ultra marathoners. Normally at my peak I would run a full marathon at 4:10. This one took me 8 hours. I just kept on going and going... no matter what. Quitting and giving up was never an option to me.
I dont believe in the words "I CAN'T" I just dont say these words. They do not exist to me. I can and I will, no matter what.
So this coming years, things will start moving up with new adventure and new races. I am going to step it up. The plan will be to run 1 or 2 marathon then 1 50 miler and 1 100 miler ultra. See how I feel. The itch will hit me again. I can feel it.
My annual bike ride across Iowa will be on next year. It will be my 11th year crossing the state of Iowa, 500 miles in 7 days. Via bicycle of course.
There will be some hikes and camping among my goals for next year. I have hiked the Grand Canyon Five times. All in the south rim. I think it is time to do a Rim to RIm to Rim hike from South to North back to south.
No more messing around next year. The new adventures begin. A new chapter of living life to the fullest with no regret. Do it now before you cant.
What I want people to say when I turn 98 years old is "Wow, he really lived life to the fullest... he has lived"
